I don't have it, by the way. And based on the way my work day started, that's probably a good thing. I did NOT quit my job today, everybody calm down, but by 8:37 am (think about that) I was so furious and frustrated that it is probably just as well that our family really needs my income. God knows what I would have done otherwise.
We have all had those days where you are thrown for such a loop -- such an infuriating, humiliating, blown out proportion loop -- that your first reaction is, "Fuck you, I quit."
Nice, happy way for my Friday to start.
Our accounting dept roled out a new policy three months ago: everything we send to a client has to be signed. More specifically, let's say client orders stuff worth $1000, I need to get it signed. Fair enough. But the next day, when client says, "Oh, and add 5 cups of coffee to that", I need to get it signed. And then when three days later, they say, "Turns out we don't need that coffee, after all," I need to get it signed.
I worked in accounting for many, many years and I completely understand why this needs to be done. Within reason. Any idea how many clients I had in August, or how many times I needed to get something signed? Quick research today showed over 680.
Which brings me to the first email I read this morning, I was goin gto summarize it but instead I'll treat you to the actual text, and I don't even CARE if it gives away my real identity:
Everyone,
As you should be aware, we had an Audit during the week of May 26th and it was found we have a major weakness, with regards to ensuring we are consistent with having signed Contracts and BEO's. These signed BEO's must be in the files of the credit manager.
Shortly, after having developed an action plan and communicating this weakness, we have been auditing this for the last 3 months and continue to have unsigned BEO's for 3 months straight . Because we need to answer about 45 key audit questions as part of our month end process, we had no choice to answer the BEO question with a "No" answer ( Not compliant ). You know I'm going to say this is unacceptable.
Please note , last months BEO's not signed are files under the responsibly of Irma Floresta.
Going forward, we expect 100% compliance, therefore would everyone in Sales and Catering please confirm your understanding. This requirement will be tested every month and is subject to follow-up conference calls with corporate office every month.
I thank you and appreciate your co-operation,
Giant Asshole
* * * *
Okay, gang, couple of things to point out: My name appears in red above because THAT'S HOW HE WROTE IT, he took the time to change my name in to a different colour to ensure it really stuck out.
Out of more than 680 documents I needed to get signed in the month of August, there was ONE that wasn't signed. So yes, he's right, we did not have everything signed, ergo we can not say we are 100% compliant, but he makes it sound like I didn't bother to get anything signed, like I didn't spend hours chasing people down, or that in the chaos of everything else I do in the run of the day, I let one piece of paper get lost in the shuffle.
And the reason he refers to me in the third person? Well that would be because he sent that email to everyone in my department, my boss, my boss's boss, the general manager, the regional comptroller, and the regional vice president.
At no point did he speak to me directly, at no point did anyone in his dept say, "Hey, Irma, you missed one, do you think you can get it signed now, even if it's after the fact?" No no, just straight to the vice president.
Ummm.....fuck you, I quit?
Lucky for me and my temper, neither my boss nor my boss's boss were in today, so there was no office I could march in to and give my resignation. Truly, that alone probably saved me. But of course, this also means I get to hash the whole thing out, over and over again, when they get back on Monday. I know they will both be indignant at the tone and substance of that email, so while I am not looking forward to hashing it all out on Monday, I know they will defend me.
Still, if anyone knows how I can pay off all my bills between now and Monday, I'd be happy to hear from you.
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2 comments:
OMG Irma! I am so pissed for you. I can't believe that someone would point out a person like that! That is crazy. Get the F-out of there! I know there is alot of exclamation points but I am so mad for you. It is ridiculous.....
holy crap! what an arse! how unprofessional. you think it's a COINCIDENCE that they weren't in? hm. this is like, #7,251 on the outrageous list of things that place likes to do to you... tell them to piss off.
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