I am the Greatest Mother in the WORLD

Yes. It's me.

I know this is true because I freaked the $%#*@% out on Son Saturday afternoon. I get the fact that he is fourteen, and that he needs to push boundaries, and that it is my job to push back.

So we're in the grocery store. Normally I get the "little" cart because all I'm usally buying is a few items; this particular day I wanted dog food, sushi, and English muffins.

But of course there were no little carts available, so I ended up with this cart the size of my car. With a bad wheel.

Son has never changed his habit of putting one hand on the cart while I'm steering (which I love about him) but this stupid cart was pulling to the side and he wasn't really helping the situation.

Finally I said, "Honey, take your hand off. This thing is massive and hard to control."

His response?

"That's what she said."

I went nine kinds of crazy all over his ass. "How DARE you speak to me like that, I'm your MOTHER, you should be ASHAMED of yourself, you little creep."

Now go over to the next aisle so I can laugh my ass off. Because, dude? That was funny.